What would your wife say?

Off limit (colored version)

(Photo credit: tanakawho)

If ever there was a glaring example of inappropriate intentions in an otherwise every-day event, this would have to be near the top of the list.

Rather than find a clever transition to jump into this, I’m just going to say it: Gentlemen, we have NO BUSINESS hitting on other men’s wives! If we’re married We have NO BUSINESS hitting on other women! Period!

The following is a story shared by a woman as an example of what NOT to do. She was bold enough to share this story on her Facebook page. Judging from her tone I’m thinking she was trying to be somewhat humorous in light of what was likely an embarrassing and nervous situation. I think there are a few more things to be said here, so I’m going to use them as examples, admonishments and encouragements.

I was working at the pharmacy and a 49-year-old man came in for the first time to get his prescription. He started talking about how I reminded him of his 20-year-old daughter — my smile and my eyes. He bragged on his daughter for a while. She was doing really well in college.

Then he talked about how pharmacists much make so much money.

I said, “well, I only work one day a week and I’m home with my children the other days.”

He looked shocked that I could possibly have children and I told him I am almost 40. He said “NO! You look 25! There is no way you are 40! That’s amazing!”

Then he said, “I would ask you if I could take you out to dinner, but I see you are married.”

I said, “yes. Very happily married.”

And he said, “Oh, I’m married too.” (Thankfully his wife was not there to hear all of this).

Then he said, “and I am a Christian and I love Jesus with all my heart. He means everything to me.”

Yikes!

If I wasn’t a believer in Christ, what message did this man just send to me?

Let’s add this to the list of ways NOT to witness for Jesus, and to the list of ways NOT to treat our spouses/significant others.

Some of you may have had some of the same thoughts I did when reading the woman’s story. But before I get to them in order, let’s jump ahead to the man’s admission late in the story.

“I am a Christian and I love Jesus with all my heart. He means everything to me.”

STOP!

This conversation should NEVER have taken place in light of this admission — certainly not if he’s going to be honest with himself. At the very least, he should have kept his thoughts to himself, paid for his prescription, and left the store.

Why on Earth would he say such a thing after propositioning the woman in the first place? I guess I’ll never know.

Some other thoughts…

While recognizing another woman may have similar appearances to your daughter may seem tame or just “making conversation,” we don’t have to ponder his motives in context of the story as told. As the father of a daughter, there’s a huge “ICK” factor in finding another woman attractive based on the attributes of your own daughter! The dude needs help!

But our friend apparently didn’t stop there.

In short, it’s safe to presume from the woman’s story that this guy was fishing for a date (to put it kindly).

Kudos to the woman for the way she apparently handled the situation. While I applaud her for this, the other side of me would like to put up a pay-per-view opportunity for her husband to deal appropriately with this guy. Then again, the better response for me would be to encourage the guy to get the help he needs and pray for him.

But the crux of the issue remains, and should serve as a lesson about how our actions impact others and how we need to guard not only our tongues, but also our minds and hearts. His actions in this story mirror the admonishment we read in Psalm 1:1.

Oh, the joys of those who do not follow the advice of the wicked, or stand around with sinners, or join in with mockers.

Do you see the progression towards temptation and sin in the passage? First we see someone agreeing to follow. Then we find the person standing with other sinners. What follows is an active participation with them.

Think of it like window-shopping. You see something that attracts your attention inside the storefront. You then stop and look; then you want it. From there your whole mentality becomes one of figuring out how to get it. Same too with things like the sexual sin our man in this example seeks.

Even so, while this guy didn’t achieve his goal on this particular day, at least with this woman, he did manage to negatively impact someone else’s life. Moreover, he set an incredibly bad example for the Kindgom of God, which he professes. He not only made someone else’s wife rather nervous and likely offended her with his conversation and its sexual undertones, but his actions here will — if left unchecked and allowed to progress — wind up hurting his wife and family, and perhaps the family of someone else after the adulterous affair he’ll end up having with someone is eventually discovered.

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2 thoughts on “What would your wife say?

    • You are so welcome. I became physically upset and angry when I read this story the first time. I’ll just leave it at that! It subsided as the thought to write this popped into my head.

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